Monday, September 19, 2011

Dawn of the Shark: Movies That Are Killing Sharks

So, I'm taking an editorial magazine writing class right now, and for the past few weeks we've been talking about blogging. Here's one of the blogs I put up on the class blog....

I'll be the first to admit it. I've been a self-proclaimed addict since I was six years old. Shark addict, that is. It started with an overly sensitive fear that kept me out of any body of water—ocean, lake, pond, sometimes even the pool—and eventually led to my current adoration for Shark Week. Naturally, you would think that I wouldn't have an issue with the trending shark obsessions. But now, with the new Shark Night 3D movie coming out, it's all becoming a bit overwhelming.

Sharktopus :: Seriously?

Yesterday, as I was perusing the aisles of Vision Video, I abruptly stopped at the image of a strange creature: a "sharktopus" as it was called. Standing there slightly awestruck by its pure hilarity I thought, "What the hell is that? And who on earth would rent that flop-of-a-movie?" But, let's be honest, Sharktopus isn't the only one if its kind. There's Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, Shark Attack 3: Megalodon and now Shark Night (and don't forget, it's 3D).

All of these terrible Hollywood films are playing with my emotions. I can't decide if I should laugh or shed a few tears. I love me some Shark Week shows filled with intensely gruesome shark attacks, or at least perfectly acted dramatizations of those attacks. And a night of Jaws is never wasted. (It was definitely a worthy first pg-13 movie when I was a kid.)

I wouldn't go as far as saying they're all bad movies, but I don't believe I'll ever give in to the corny shark creations. It's almost a disgrace to the sharkdom of Discovery Channel and Jaws. Maybe I'm taking it too seriously though. Maybe I'm missing the whole point of an overly-corny film. What do you think? Are these shark movies cheap Hollywood atrocities or simply incredible entertainment?